A Fruitful Discernment

It brings me great joy & peace to be able to conclude my discernment of where I'll be pursuing my degree. I want to really praise Almighty God for being my ever constant throughout this period of discernment. I also am very grateful & appreciative of the many people who have walked with me throughout this discernment, especially my ever supportive family & community. Your support sustained me throughout this discernment.

So the final decision of my discernment is that I will be staying in Singapore to pursue my degree in Psychology. Yay! I'm so happy to be able to share my decision on my blog. Yes, this is final!

God has certainly surprised me in so many ways throughout this discernment. But what I gained the most throughout this discernment has been how I've come to a much deeper & greater self-discovery of myself, especially the people & things that I hold close to me heart. This is a discernment that I would never regret and I'm so glad that I made the decision to discern this from August 2011. Its been a 9-month discernment that has brought me through a rollercoaster of emotions where I've gone back & forth in my decision numerous times. There really hasn't been a distinct choice throughout this discernment. Its basically discerning from 'Good' and 'Good'. There has been no choice that is out rightly better than the other. God has truly been a faithful God. God didn't waste any time to confirm for me that I made the right decision. As soon as I shared with my mum about my decision to pursue my degree in Singapore, she quickly shared with me that she had decided to tell me to pursue my degree here as that would ease the family's financial burden. What an amazing & quick way for God to affirm me of my choice. The defining factor in my decision is actually my Family.

Throughout the entire process of my 9 months of discernment, there have been many pulling factors in staying and going. There were pulling factors in staying in singapore like family being in singapore, Community being in singapore, my comfort zone of staying in singapore as I was fully taken care of in every aspect & ect. But there were other pulling factors to go to aussie such as a more holistic studying experience, living the dream of staying in aussie, meeting new people, to be challenged in thinking in a very different environment, being more independent & ect. At the very end of my discernment, I just felt weary and didn't know which choice was God's call for me. Throughout the final few weeks of my discernment, I felt so confused & weary. In prayer, God spoke, "My Son, my will for you lies in the very core of your being. You will find your answer there." So as I continued to search for the answer, I just waited upon God in prayer, in the silence of my heart. The answer did come in the end! It was during my silent time in the adoration room when God showed me a perspective that I had never seen throughout the entire discernment. For years, I have been serving God in SFX. Ever since I came back to God 5 years ago, I always desired deep down in my heart to serve my family. I just didn't know how or where to start. It was during this time of silent prayer when God showed me that I would be able to serve my family by easing their financial burden, especially my parents. This choice would not only ease their financial burden but it would also give the family more opportunities to take holiday trips and bonding more as a family. This perspective really excited me so much. I was truly in total of God for this revelation. The thought of serving my family was so exciting for me. At that moment, I just knew that at the very core of my being, I just wanted to serve God! In that moment, it would be such an honour & privilege to serve my family! This was the desire at the very core of my being. This became the defining point in my decision-making process.

Its really been a very blessed & fruitful discernment! I want to firstly thank my family for their endless support! I also thank my beloved community, Youth Vineyard for their faithful love & support unto me. I also would like to apologise to everyone that I have caused any form of uneasiness throughout my discernment, for like going back & forth in my discernment decision. I also thank everyone involved with your support in one way or another, like SFX youth communities, friends at work, friends in aussie and many more. I want to also thank the many individuals that have journeyed with throughout this entire discernment. I am forever grateful! Holy God I praise for everything! :)

God Bless!

PS: Sorry for this super delayed post! Been quite busy since I concluded the discernment! Better late than never right! :)