Adapting to change

It's really been the longest time since the last time I posted anything on this blog. Well, it be exact, I haven't posted anything since I started my university studies in July 2012. Its been a series of excuses ranging from busyness, lack of motivation, laziness & ect. But here goes one.

It's been a very interesting past 7 months, since uni started. There have alot of changes in my life, some good and some not so good. Entering university was probably the best thing that has happened to me. There have been so many positives from university, well at least to me. I feel that I have grown so much as a person, not just in the spiritual, but also in intellect as well as drive towards the person I want to be. University has given an avenue to place all this passion and energy within me and to put it to good use. I also feel that I have added to my character. It was challenging initially when I started to add different dimensions to my identity. I must admit that it did take me a while to get comfortable with the 'new mark'. But as I reflect on this, I feel good about the new additions to my character. But I have become aware that many people have found it difficult to adapt to the new changes within me. I feel good because I feel very passionate about what I am working towards. I feel positively drive and find myself more grounded. 

My first semester in university was definitely very challenging. But amidst all the crazy deadlines, I saw a purpose within all of it. In a way, that purpose made it not just worthwhile, but also gave me direction. I absolutely love what I am studying. I know its rare in our society to find people who love what they're studying. This is truly a gift from God. Its also quite interesting for me as I study psychology. I find that this discipline of study has given me much foundation in understanding people in a much better way. Till today, this joy & excitement i get from studying psychology feels surreal.

Adapting to the additions has its ups & downs. There are many moments when I feel very distant from God. But during my semester, God has been teaching me to see & experience him through the people I meet as well the things I learn as I study. God has been speaking to me in a very new and true way. I find that its easier relating to God throughout my daily happenings. But there still are many moments when I struggle to accept this new way of relating to God. There are times when I miss certain elements from the person I used to be. But now, I find it easier as I try to find a balance between the 'old me' and the 'new me'. You could say that much of the adapting is over, although its not totally done with.

As my next semester starts in 2 days, I enter the new semester with a great sense of hope. I intend to keep things authentic. But as I know what to expect, I am more prepared psychologically. There is an element of fear as well, because I hope not to return to that zone where school is the most important thing above everything else. I also hope to do better in my grades, but certainly not at the expense of enjoying the learning. I believe that one would enjoy his/her studies as well as do really well, when one focuses on the joy of learning. In so many ways, I hope that would become a reality for me in this upcoming semester. I'm sure this will happen in time.

University has done so much for me and will continue to do much for me. But I think what is the most amazing gift is the joy of learning what I am passionate about. Mesh your passion and profession together. Don't let society tell you what career you should choose. Allow yourself to live out your best potential. Don't shortchange the world of who you were meant to be! And always praise god, for he is our provider! He never abandons us.